Be Your Own Advocate
Doing so could literally be the difference between life and death
By: Kim Carlos, J.D.

I know from personal experience as a breast cancer survivor that we must become our own advocates as it relates to our health. Cancer taught me the importance of becoming an advocate; asking the hard questions; taking action and being proactive. I am happy to say that I am now in complete remission because I was my own advocate. I had been doing my monthly breast self-exam, felt the lump, and took immediate action. I learned from the day of my diagnosis that it was important to be my own advocate and take control of my own health and life - no one else was going to do it for me. This allowed me to get the best care possible; it empowered me and gave me more control over my disease. Advocating on my own behalf improved the quality of health care I ultimately received.

In the area of health and wellness, there are many ways to become an advocate. Advocate for yourself. Advocate for a family member or friend. Advocate for other individual patients who may not be able to speak for themselves. The lessons I learned throughout my cancer experience about becoming a patient advocate are tools that you can apply in your own life.

Arm yourself with information so that you can be an educated patient or caregiver making informed decisions. Do your homework. When I was diagnosed with breast cancer, I read everything I could get my hands on. I searched the internet seeking reliable information. I spoke to dozens of cancer survivors seeking their advice - asking them what choices they’d made and why. I interviewed doctors.

Build your medical team and establish strong communication with your doctor. Realize that you are a part of the team. Talk openly about symptoms, treatments and goals. Remember, this is a partnership where there should be trust, respect and honesty. At times, I would challenge my doctors and ask why they were choosing treatment X over treatment Y. They respected me as a patient and as a member of the team. Come prepared with your questions and make sure you understand the answers. And remember that no question is “dumb”. The only “bad” question is the one you wish you had asked. Never feel embarrassed to ask a doctor to define a word or speak in a language you can understand. During my treatment, I found that it was difficult to absorb information when I heard it for the first time. I started bringing a tape recorder to my appointments with my doctors so that I could review it later and make sure I heard everything correctly. I also always had my husband or someone else go along with me to all of my appointments. Take a friend of family member with you. They can be there for support and lend another ear to hear information you may miss.

Don’t be afraid to get second opinions. Your doctor should welcome your request for a second opinion. Now is not the time to be polite and worry about hurting the doctor’s feelings. When one of my doctors was not answering my questions, I got a second opinion and ended up changing doctors. Do whatever it takes to feel good about the decisions you are making. You know your own body better than anyone else - listen to your body.

Take care of YOU first. As women, we are often the main providers for our children’s health and well-being; help manage our partners’ health needs and might also be taking care of an aging or sick relative. We take care of everyone else first, and then if time allows, we take care of ourselves. The problem with this approach is that if you don’t take care of yourself, you can’t take care of others. So, take care of yourself.

I encourage each of you to not only find your voice, but make it heard when dealing with your health care. You could be saving your own life or that of someone you love.

Kim Carlos, J.D. is President of K.C. Consulting, LLC and a sought after author and speaker on patient advocacy topics. She may be reached at kimcarlos@kc.rr.com.