Credible, Likeable, Memorable
Compelling Communications
By: Larna Anderson Beebe

Do people roll their eyes and grit their teeth when we speak, or do they drop what they are doing and lean forward expectantly? When we speak in interviews, in meetings, at the water cooler, with a client or on the phone, our listeners will draw conclusions based on what we say and how we say it. Whether we want to be a better leader, want to improve our reports to managers or want to enhance the way we connect with others in everyday encounters, compelling communication is the key.

Prepare
A speaking voice that is steady, clear and deep sounds more credible than one that is shaky, mumbled or high pitched. Verbal crutches such as “um,” “er” or “you know” can diminish our content. Practice with a recording device, voice trainer or speech therapist can help us to sound more compelling. We are perceived as more likeable and professional if we listen well, do not interrupt and when it is our turn to speak, converse comfortably on the topic at hand. Confidence in ourselves and the topic plays a large part in how we communicate. We may be judged on our ability to answer a question on the spot without the opportunity to refer to notes. We will be calm and confident even under pressure if we possess general knowledge of current affairs, general knowledge of the entire company and in-depth knowledge of our own department, tasks and projects. British billionaire businessman, Richard Branson holds meetings in his swimming pool, thereby forcing his staff to attend paperless and laptop-less, able to site critical information at any time and in any place.

Personalize
Our audience pays closer attention when we phrase our communication in terms of “so what?” and “what is in it for them?” When something seems meaningful to others, they are more inclined to invite us to expand on the idea. There are some universal human desires such as the need for reward, recognition, recreation, rejuvenation and romance. We have an added advantage if we know what drives our individual listener. The success of our project may lead to a monetary bonus for others, but if time off is what they seek, then we have missed the mark. Everyone has a personal preferred speaking style. Martha Stewart and Ellen DeGeneres both convey warmth and wit yet they have distinctly different speaking styles and senses of humor. If we were to pitch an idea to Martha Stewart, we could speak more slowly, more deliberately and use correct grammar. On the other hand, Ellen DeGeneres would be more captivated by our pitch if we spoke more rapidly, more colloquially and in an animated way.

Pinpoint
When we ramble, we appear confused and we confuse our audience. We can practice saying one main idea in one sentence. In our time-crunched world, people appreciate us getting succinctly to the point. If we are invited to expand on a topic, we should be mindful of optimum word selection and non-repetitive ideas. By way of example, it is better to say the word “nation” rather than “the people who make up our country.” If we have already stated that, “we are a nation of philanthropists,” it would be redundant to add “and we give generously to those in need.” Abraham Lincoln’s famous and compelling Gettysburg Address was only 10 sentences, 285 words and spoken in less than three minutes. In contrast, the preceding 13,607-word oration by Edward Everett delivered over a two-hour period is not fondly nor easily remembered. We do not need to speak our entire mind or say everything we know on a matter. It is often better to communicate just enough to arouse the curiosity level of our listener.

Plug
On occasion we need to be discerning enough to know when to put a plug in our pie hole. Author and socialite Lady Dorothy Nevill once said, “The real art of conversation is not only to say the right thing at the right place but to leave unsaid the wrong thing at the tempting moment.” An old proverb with regards to closing the sale suggests that the one who speaks first loses. We should learn to be as comfortable with silence as with chatter. A speaker’s meaningful pause or a listener’s pensive pondering can be as powerful as words. In communication, research shows that nonverbal communication contributes 55 percent of the entire message while words contribute seven percent, and the delivery of our words contributes 38 percent. We should resist the temptation to think aloud and thereby run the risk of regret for putting our high-heeled shoe down our own throat. In addition, we should hold back on foul language as it does nothing to enhance our message and can offend our audience beyond forgiveness.

Picture
Our communication appeals to both the ears and eyes of our listeners when we create compelling mental pictures. Our words can help others to see what we mean. Especially when we are talking about an abstract idea or a new concept; we should link it to a known point of reference. In 1982, two men first opened their “fun warehouse restaurant” concept in Dallas, Texas. This was the first Dave & Buster’s, which combined the dining experience from Buster’s Restaurant with Dave’s “Slick Willy’s World of Entertainment” adult gaming fun. CEC Entertainment, Inc., known to consumers as Chuck E. Cheese’s, headquartered in Irving, Texas, was originally incorporated under the name Showbiz Pizza Place, Inc. and began trading on NASDAQ in 1989. In order to sell the idea and enable people to picture the concept, Chuck E. Cheese’s was originally described as “Dave & Buster’s for kids.”

Persuade
To tell someone what to do rarely works unless we are managing a battlefield, an emergency or medical prescriptions. Managers with a telling style are not popular. Business professionals need to perfect the art of persuasion. The five steps of persuasion are:

• Communicate the problem and proposed solution. For example: In order to maintain a leading edge, we should update our current technology.
• State the benefits to the audience. For example: The benefits include gaining market share amongst the youth and everyone gains when the company grows.
• Dispel foreseeable objections before they are expressed. For example: You may think that technology means cutbacks, however, we will require all our employees when our customer base increases.
• Seek points of agreement and show empathy for the listeners. For example: We realize the transition may not be smooth therefore we do want your feedback and will provide training of new skills.
• Call for support. For example: We ask that you embrace advancement and the opportunities it brings.

Once people understand that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, they will cooperate with implementation.

We all know people with the reputation for either improving the silence or contributing to global warming every time they open their mouths. What is your communication reputation? It is not our listener’s job to remember us favorably, but it is our responsibility to give consideration to what we say and how we say it so that we and our message are more credible, likeable and memorable.

Larna Anderson Beebe is a speaker and author who has presented to audiences in nine countries on the subjects of leadership and competitiveness. Contact her at 913.642.1114.

Article Source: http://www.flourishmagazine.com



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